Thursday, September 15, 2022

Still Learning...(or, Hard-fought Gratefulness)


Happy Half-way though September!
We easily see the halfway mark of a month...
not so with a life!
But one thing is certain for we plowing through forties, fifties and beyond,
barring the exception, we have well surpassed the halfway point of our lives!
Wow! How much I don't know that my younger self thought by now I would!!

'Live and learn' has become my middle-age mantra.
Still so much to learn!



I was going to post this poem this morning after the first stanza
then I felt a little niggle, like another stanza jiggling the door knob,
so I opened it...
The door turned out to be a floodgate...of things still being learned!😅


Still learning to give holy thanks, to think before I speak
To seek and prize the lowly ranks of ‘blessed are the meek’
To cling less fiercely to the string of Things and Plans unfurled
To make the shadow of God’s wings, my refuge in this world
To lay up treasure where no vice corrupts, mars or defiles
To weigh the payoff, not the price of walking ‘second miles’
To not rebel beneath the ‘nope’ of mercy’s faultless rod
But, to anchor my hope in steadfast promises from God
To keep the faith, not disillusioned by what blurs my view
As breath by breath, death closes in, till ‘still learning’ is through

To count my blessings, not life’s lack, to make the most of now
Before tomorrow’s looking back beholds its rendered How
To trust the Love that withholds wants and wishes for my good Best
To teach me how to better bow without proud, loud protest
To stun me with the goodness of His all-sufficient grace
As wonder over wonder floods the would-be commonplace
To satisfy my longing with the whisper of His Name
He helps me press toward the mark until faith’s prize I claim
…to cast before His throne, the honor of crown upon crowns
To hail our Heavenly Father faithful through life’s ups and downs

To yield, with all my heart, not just a small part, now and then
To know that He is able and changeless for aye, amen
To commit to His keeping all I do not understand
To fit my doubting fingers through the nail-holes in His Hand
To place my cares, prayer upon prayers into ‘Thy will be done’
To put on God’s whole armor to withstand the evil one
To ask Him to set a watch over the door of my lips
Because, oh Lord, how easily the unbridled tongue slips
Still learning how to listen, to be slow to anger, oh
Still learning to keep turning to the One who loves me so

Still learning to linger in Time’s showcase of majesty
Where fringes of God’s glory overflow sky, sod and sea
Where EL OLAM, Eternal God, thought cannot comprehend
The rock of my salvation and my nearest, dearest friend
Still learning to be awed by God’s resolute holiness
Still learning to be patient when His answer is not ‘yes’
Still learning to remember what I ought not to forget
Still learning how to follow the example Jesus set
And how to keep my balance on the beam of consequence
While I harvest the bitter fruit of disobedience

Still learning to esteem and redeem precious, numbered days
While learning to keep leaning on God’s very patient ways
Still learning to depend upon His Word that will not fail
(Sometimes I share a chuckle with the mirror’s telling tale)
Glad for a sense of humor while I weather what I must
Bearing in mind what will survive this grind of dust to dust
While learning through mistakes I wish I would know nothing of
The tender pangs and aches of highs and lows that come with love
And learning, while still learning not to miss the measure earned
Of triumph’s hard-fought gratefulness for truths and lessons learned

© Janet Martin


How precious is Your loving devotion, O God, 
that the children of men take refuge in the shadow of Your wings!

O LORD, do not withhold Your mercy from me; 
Your loving devotion and faithfulness will always guard me.




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