Thursday, August 25, 2011

Symphony


There is a symphony
Born in the dusk
Swept through the linden-tree
And rows of corn husk
I cannot hear it
In the high-tide of noon
It waits for the midnight
And the lofty white moon

Scented with flowers
And rain-thickened breeze
It seeps from the bowers
Of August’s dark trees
Over dim meadows
Of shower-bent grass
Across dormant shadows
Its tender notes pass

August’s fair dawn
Is a gift to behold
Painting the lawn
In whispers of gold
But I choose the song
Of rich harmony
Dripping from the tongue
Of a midnight sea

There is a symphony
Drifting down a dark lane
Across wind-swept lea
After August’s rain
Dark blue-bells weep
On the pale anemone
I cannot sleep
So I listen…alone

Janet~

...and to think on most nights
I miss it!!



10 comments:

  1. This is amazing. You have such a way with words and phrases. As much as I love rhyme, I'm hoping to find some free verse and/or more complicated rhyming schemes. This looks so easy--and I'm sure it isn't--that I'd like to see you stretch. Just keep writing.

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  2. Thank-you Mike,
    Mike, straying from my well-beaten path terrifies me...:) I know rhyming poetry is rejected in most publications, and that is never why I have written. I do not know the 'rules' for free verse...whenever I try it, it comes out sounding like a bunch of senseless rambling and I 'chuck' it:) Thank-you for the encouragement. I would love to try and 'stretch' a little...

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  3. Rhyme is my preference too, but some subjects do well in free verse. There are no rules. The trick is in the line breaks and flow when read aloud.

    So far, I haven't found anything like a sonnet in your writing. The restraint of iambic pentameter, along with the rhyming scheme, might prove to be that stretch. I like the English (Shakespearian) sonnets, but there are many types. Dare you.

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  4. ...all I can say is, 'I'd like to think I might try...:)'

    I do not consider myself a 'poet'...but I love poetry. I have never been educated in any of its grammatical terms but I am learning.
    I appreciate the dare...its got me thinking...and smiling:)

    ...now for a topic...h-m-m-m. I do SO love this challenge.

    Thank-you for even bothering to comment. I read quite a few pages of your poetry this morning and am working my way through your entire blog. SO inspiring. I have a few tagged in my mind as fav's. I'll let you know.

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  5. ...now i shall find out what defines a sonnet...

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  6. First, your Symphony: a beautiful evocation, full of lovely phrases.
    As Mike says, this theme would lend itself very well to free verse. If you're frightened to leave off the comfort blanket of rhyme, you could bury them as internal rhymes - make the reader work to find them. Or you could go for half rhyme subtlety. Mike gave me a link to a wonderfully helpful site to find half rhymes, and I use it all the time now: http://www.b-rhymes.com/

    One point, you have stuck to the old-fashioned Capital letter at the start of each line, which is strange when allied to the modernist lack of punctuation! One thing or the other?

    As for a sonnet - you are so nearly there that might be less of a leap for you than free verse.

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  7. vivinfrance,

    All I can say is a deep and humble...thank-you. I'm sure I don't need to tell you I am but a homespun writer who likes to rhyme for a hobby,yet I have a passion for things poetic and would love to learn more. I appreciate your visit and comment immensely.

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  8. vivinfrance.
    I really enjoyed the site you offered and have book-marked it for reference...but I always considered myself as 'cheating' when I almost rhymed...I work hard to perfectly rhyme...some of the the time...don't you see?
    It just comes naturally...but I'll do as you suggest and try to...stretch:):)) Thank-you again.

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  9. I am fascinated by your comments in response to Mike and Viv, that you feel you must have perfect rhymes. The classical poets [yes, even Shakespeare]loved the challenge of finding slant rhymes that worked because it required more dexterity. And internal rhyme is like finding gold. If you will, straightforward rhyme is the easiest, which is not to belittle rhyme, only to say that perfect rhymes are where you start before moving to other types of rhyme.

    I am a free verse writer, for the most part, and even when I write in a recognised form other than free verse, my rhymes are internal. If you feel jumping into free verse is too much of a leap, try a form that does not require rhyme but still gives you the more formal structure.

    I'll bet you did not wake up this morning expecting to find three people challenging you. Like the others say, your poetry is such we want to see you stretch.

    margo

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  10. Can I be honest? I don't know the first thing about 'real' poetry! The fact that three 'real poets' have dropped by my little hobby blog intimidates me..on the other hand.... I am terribly bored with the stuff I've been writing and would
    love to stretch. Yes, straightforward rhyme is the easiest and I confess I am very comfortable there. When I started this blog it intensified my love for writing, and I am very ready for more of a challenge. I appreciate the interest more than I can say...

    Thank-you so much.

    Can't wait to read your blog.

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